We have all heard at this point that there is going to be a Gilmore Girls revival on Netflix sometime in the next year or so. It may be good or it may not. I do not care. I have modest but specific hopes for it: namely, that Amy Sherman-Palladino make Emily Gilmore a late-in-life lesbian.

I. The Motorcycle Crash
II. Eaten By Bear at Zoo
III. Slowly Crushed By His Collection of Sweet Lids
IV. Beaten to Death By a Loan Shark
V. Infection From Tattoo He Got With Third Wife
VI. Burned Alive During The Wicker Man-Style Ritual That Stars Hollow Performs Every Eighteen Years

Lorelai Gilmore (Phil Gordon) "Philippa was a lively personage, infamous for her indecision, and loved wherever she went due to her extreme beauty, mirth and comicality." Sounds about right. Rory Gilmore (Anne of Green Gables) A weakness for reading and braids and hypersensitivity. Paris Gellar (Gilbert Blythe) I should not have to remind you that Paris and Rory are canon.

Bitmap Bombardier has released a Gilmore Girls tribute album, and you can listen to it right here, or just talk smack about Dean and Jess AND THE NETFLIX RELEASE OF THE WHOLE DAMN SHOW.

[Please note that this essay consciously ignores certain events that transpired in season 7 because...ugh.]

When I was 15, I thought Lorelai Gilmore was perfect.

Not actually perfect, I wasn't so naive that I couldn't see her flaws, but she was my ideal, the person I most wanted to be if I could crack the code: witty, charming, smart, beautiful, resilient...able to converse with men without turning bright red or

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Other entries in the series can be found here. Most recently: Adventure Time, Come On, Grab Your Friends. This installment of Femslash Friday is dedicated to Friend of the Toast Rainbow Rowell.  I am going to make you want something that you may or may not have already known that you wanted. I am going to make you realize that the real love story at the heart of Gilmore Girls took place between…