If I had no other obligations — and if I hadn’t wrecked my wrists a few years back — I would knit all the time; literally fall asleep knitting at night and pick it up as soon as I woke in the morning. (In this scenario I would also have maidens to feed me so I would not have to take any breaks to eat.) But because I don’t live in a fantasy, I mostly knit while
The heel is where the success—or failure—of a sock rests, at once mysterious and intimidating. Many a knitter has advanced toward the heel, wits intact, only to find the perplexing combination of knit stitches, slip stitches, wraps, and turns too much for the nerves.
Perhaps it was the Vicodin, but I faced my virginal heel experience with a casual bravado.
1. PENIS COSIES. Ravelry, the largest social network for people who do yarn-related crafts, records four patterns for knit penis cosies, one crochet pattern for the same, and seven lip balm cosies that look like penises. Although the term “penis cosy” suggests that only the penis is involved, all of the penis cosy patterns include a little sweater for the testicles as well. This last detail suggests a misandrist plot, as overheated testicles…
All the astronomers are busy all the time. They have excuses: ‘Oh, I’m at a conference’; ‘Oh, I’m writing a research paper.’ Actually they are all in a secret knitting club for astronomers. They’re making a giant representation of the cosmos, a scale model. They have to knit fast because the universe is rushing away from itself. They argue about the proper way to render black holes in yarn. Derek specializes in nebulae; Megan details asteroids. They’re making this…
