Amy Collier last wrote for The Toast about the wonderful world of Disney word searches.
When I say “Major” you say “Laser!”
Major
_ _ _ _
Major
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Everybody hands up! Hands up! Hands up!
If you love paninis make some noise right now.
When I say dance, everybody go this way,
and this way,
and this way.
I want to see everyone feel the sweet nostalgia of a homemade panini waiting for you on a dinner plate.
I want to see everybody clap like this.
Keep those hands up!
When I say “grill” you say “more.”
Grill
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Grill
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Everyone consider what kind of ingredients you would put in your very own homemade panini if you had the right tools to make that panini.
All my sexy ladies make some fucking noise for ciabatta.
I want to see everyone who has ever longed for the tender crunch of a warm Italian deli sandwich with two hands in the air. Put em up!
If you spread your bread with pesto every night I want to see you get low to the ground. Low low low low low. Everybody get down!
I need one volunteer from the audience! Italian flag shirt, get up here. You gotta hurry up though. Hurry up, or I’ll pick someone else.
Italian flag shirt on the count of three I need you to dance like you’re back in Italy.
You’re definitely not from here if you dance like that.
Now Italian flag shirt, I want you to take this ungrilled sandwich, loaded with mozzarella, fresh peppers and succulent eggplant, I want you to lay it in this Major Lazer Panini Press 3000 which is available now on our website, and I want you to press that sandwich until it has toasted into a delicious vehicle of melted cheese and veggies, then I want you to drive that vehicle straight into your mouth. Now press!
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Eat it
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Italian flag shirt, is that not the best panini you have ever tasted in your life?
Now, security, I want you to throw him into the crowd.
Now, crowd, I want you to take him all the way back to Italy.
Everybody hands up!
I want you to turn to someone and say “MajorLazerPaniniPress.com”
Tags: business, drugs, edm, food, major lazer, music, panini presses
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Lorde is kind of over getting told to throw her hands up in the air. I wonder if she’d consider this an acceptable substitute?
I AM MAKING NOISE FOR CIABATTA
bubble bread, bubble, bubble, bubble bread
turn around, grill it out, show the world you got a
bubble bread, bubble, bubble, bubble bread
i’m into this
i’m kind of obsessed with this and not ashamed to admit it.
Everybody hands up (if you took to google to see if the major lazer panini press is real)
I do not know what Major Lazer or EDM is but I still loved this, A+
What I gathered from the time I had a free ticket to a concert and stood in the back taking notes on herd mentality, is that EDM stands for “Ensparkled Drug Mob.” Also, thank you!
Incredibly disappointed that majorlazerpaninipress.com doesn’t redirect to this page.
Keep trying.
Still nothing 🙁
Hey guys!! I found a coupon code for their site: PON_DE_GRILL1
Be sure to enter it at checkout when you’re purchasing your Major Lazer Panini Press 3000
Hey guys!! I found a coupon code for their site: PON_DE_GRILL1
Be sure to enter it at checkout when you're purchasing your Major Lazer Panini Press 3000
What I gathered from the time I had a free ticket to a concert and stood in the back taking notes on herd mentality, is that EDM stands for "Ensparkled Drug Mob." Also, thank you!
Keep trying.
Major Lazer’s (ETA: former) hype man Skerrit Bwoy follows me on twitter, and that is my single greatest internet accomplishment. One time when I was in college he favorited one of my tweets about studying for finals.
Amy Collier, your bio may be the best
My mom has an autographed picture of Fabio because my aunt sold him a Hummer once and she asked for that as part of the sale.