Dirtbag Hans Christian Andersen -The Toast

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Home: The Toast

hcaPreviously in this series: Dirtbag Arthur Miller.

Can I buy a match, please?
[The Little Match Girl uses every match in the book at once to light her cigarette]
i dont know
can you


thats a nice looking tree
Thank you
nice looking house
thank you
nice looking dinner
can I have some 
I’m so sorry, do I know you?
can i have some of that dinner
I think you should go home
fine i’ll just sit here on this nice doorstep of yours
be a real shame if someone froze to death on this nice doorstep

hca3the ocean is bullshit
would you like legs instead
you could live somewhere else if you had legs
legs are bullshit
so do you want them or
at least its different bullshit
but you’ll have to give something up in exchange for them
your voice
talking is bullshit
okay so can I have it then
you tell me
your the one who likes voices so much, you tell me


oh, sister
you’re going to have to kill the prince
i’m so sorry
and his bride
we spoke to the sea witch
it’s the only way to keep you alive
you must coat your legs in their blood
i’m so sorry
i know you love him
but it’s the only way
its cool its done
i just finished
then you knew?
knew what
that it would save your life?
save my what
what are you doing?
wow i thought the ocean was full of fish
not questions

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