e.l.f. Cream Eyeliner with Brush, $3. Rarely in our never-ending quest for the perfect drug store dupe do we come across one as perfect as this by asking the waitress at Red Robin what makes her eyes so beautifully catlike. Even the included brush works. Today is a miracle.
AG Stevie Ankle Jeans, $99.95 (were $178) These come in three shades. Which is your favorite? And is it just me, or does the way ankle length jeans kick out at the cuff drive you nuts to the point that you have to cuff them and then what’s the point of them buying them pre-hemmed at that length in the firs place?
Boombox iPhone Amplifier, $2.95 (was $7.95) Check out the glowing review from a self-described “cool aunt.” No idea how this thing works but it’s gotta be better than using the bathroom sink as a mini amphitheater and then accidentally turning the water on not that we know anyone who’s done that.
Tretorn Wings Rain Boots, $42.48 (were $84.99) Sooooo, Target carries Tretorns? And they are almost half off? And spring hasn’t yet sprung? And they come in four colors. Life is full of surprises.
Jerada Wool Rug, 9×12 is $499 (was $1,529) and smaller sizes are also on sale. This is that rug you see in a staged real estate listing and think “Sure, the house would be worth a million dollars if it came with that rug.”
Club L Optical Illusion Maxi Dress, $31 (was $60) Reminiscent me of the gown Mya wore to the Grammys on Monday.
Drew Wide Hoop Earrings, $9.09 (were $29) These things are large and in charge.
Courtney Dress, $200 (was $290) Still a lot, but still not that much to spend on a floor-length gold (copper?) sequined Halston-esque stunner. Reviews say it runs large, but it looks like it’s supposed to fit loosely, so who knows.
Matrix LED Screen, $2,495.95 (was $4,000) What is this? Still want.
I love AG Stevies! However, I cannot buy ankle length pants ever for that reason, I cuff them and it renders the cut useless. I do wish more “skinny” jeans were actually skinny enough to wear with ankle boots without cuffing them awkwardly I just can’t deal with that extra fabric above the boot.
Jane, can you please do “How to be a Girl” tutorials again, for the Toast? I need more smoky eye and cat eye wisdom (thought to be fair I’ve never tried that tape trick you explained in that one video). That cream eyeliner looks intimidating so I might stick with my Bobbi Brown long-wear gel eyeliner and overdraw the line anyway.
Yes yes yes to the idea of more How To Be A Girl (and more Jane Marie in general, actually, I want to be her when I grow up)
The solution to your jeans problem is to become a Tall Person. Then every pair of jeans are ankle jeans! Lol
Ohhh! NOW it makes sense!
Agreed!! I LOVED the How to Be a Girl series. Also: I tried the cat eye trick, and it worked like gangbusters! HIGHLY recommend.
I will have to try it! I try to do winged eyeliner most weekend nights to varying degrees of success. With any luck, one day I will truly master the subtle wing and the cat eye.
I like makeup tutorials, but maybe “How to Femme” or “How to Makeup” would be a better title for The Toast? (/SJW)(/ThatPerson)
Yeah, of course! That was just the name of the video series when it was featured on the Hairpin.
Oh, of course! No worries.
drive-by high-fives for someone willing to be That Person, you rock. Also because “How to Femme” or variations thereon sounds amazing. “How To Femme Like Jane Marie”
I will ask the bosses. 🙂
Yessssss
I can’t makeup, and I can handle that eyeliner far better than I can handle most pencils.
I have the e.l.f. cream eyeliner! It works really well. The brush that came with mine is significantly more angled than the one in that pic, which is a good thing, I think. Also, it does not smudge even a tiny bit, once it’s on your eye it stays there (for like, 3 days, honestly). I did find it took a couple passes to get it totally opaque but that’s cool by me. Would recommend!
Yeah should I just get it for kicks? I mean, I already have a black gel eyeliner but another one couldn’t hurt right? With shipping it’s still only $8…
No idea how it stacks up to other gel eyeliners, it’s the first and only one I’ve tried, but if you like the genre I’d say go for it! Also, if you don’t want to pay for shipping, they stock e.l.f. at CVS, which is where I got mine.
Also at Target! I have yet to find a e.l.f. product I haven’t liked. (I do wish they had a wider range of foundation, bc I think I’m in between shades right now having been out of the sun for so long.)
Wegmans carries e.l.f. too!
What *don’t* they do?? <3
I have the pricey make up forever gel pot and the e.l.f. one is just as good.
if you’re willing to spend $8, L’oreal makes my all time favorite gel liner, and it also comes with a brush that I prefer to the elf one (it’s softer and thinner)
lineur intense????
I think it’s called Lacquer Liner
Co-sign all of this.
I think I’m confused about what Friday Bargain Bin is…because I was excited about the elf cream eyeliner but then I think I am supposed to laugh at everything? Anyways, good to know it works well! Apologies for articulating and/or not getting the joke…
I think it’s really just whatever catches her eye? Could be ridiculous-looking clothing or great deals on cool things, and you can laugh at whatever you find funny? My guess, anyway.
Haha, okay, makes sense!
Yes, thank you! I’m glad it’s not just me!
Ugh stop I don’t need more eyeliner but you’re making me want this!!
I’m fed up with the pencil kind of eyeliner, so this is well timed. I want the copper and the “punk purple” but I don’t think i can justify spending five bucks on shipping three dollar eyeliner. I’ll look in stores.
Target, and usually CVS/Walgreens carries E.L.F. Also sometimes you can find it for even cheaper at Big Lots!
What if you have really greasy eyelids and hooded eyes, a combo I call “The Racoonmaker”? Do you think you’d have to prime to get it to stay, or would it stay unsmudged anyway?
I would also like to hear from oily-lidded people who have gel eyeliner recs! I tried one (I think it was Rimmel “24 hour”) and it smudged within hours. And I do use Nars smudgeproof eyeshadow base. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
I have greasy lids and hooded eyes *and* they’re huge and downturned and deep set (think Clara Bow) in a way that mysteriously makes “travel-proof” makeup still travel. I also have about a dozen of those elf gel liners. Normally I prime with a MAC paint pot (Soft Ocre) so it’s a non-issue but IIRC, they do a pretty good job of staying put without. The ones with a bit of sparkle to them, like copper and a gunmetal one that seems to be discontinued, tended to transfer a bit, but the black and coffee don’t budge, provided you apply it well –multiple layers to build up vs one big globby one– and give it a second to set. In fact, I like the look of a ever-so-slightly smoked out liner and I have to work pretty quickly to go over it with a pencil brush before it sets and Shall Not Be Moved.
They do dry out and change texture over the course of a year or so, which isn’t the end of the world because they’re so cheap and I can feel virtuous about actually replacing my eye makeup in the recommended time. Good luck!
Yeah I like the paint pots. Generally I just use liquid liner. Kat Von D’s tattoo liner is my favorite.
So far primer has been my only solution to that problem, alas. I have this elf liner, and it is indeed really good, but I still prime first. I’ve been using the Vasanti All Star 2 in 1 face and eye primer (on my eyes only) that I got in a sample size from Birchbox, and it works better than any other one I’ve tried.
My eyelids laugh in the face of primer and “creaseless” eyeshadow and smudge anyway, but I have had success with both MAC fluidliner and Stila smudgesticks although sometimes by the evening they are getting smudge-able.
Hi! I have one partial monolid and one teeny double lid, and greasy-ish eyelids, and I can’t get eye makeup of any kind to stay without primer. I use Urban Decay Primer Potion, one of the only non-drugstore products I’ve ever bought, and it seems to mostly work well for me. I know some people have drugstore primers they like, though.
I LOVE e.l.f. products and will now have to try this liner.
BEST FOOLPROOF way to keep concealer from gathering in your undereye creases: start with elf Hydrating Undereye Primer ($3!), let soak in for a minute, then dab/brush/sponge on your concealer, and brush a bit of the High Definition Undereye Setting Powder (again, only $3!) on top.
I cannot tell you how many higher-end Sephora-sold products I tried before I hit on this elf combination, courtesy of a blogger.
I am SUPER going to try this, thank you!
Arg, I love skinny jeans, but getting them to fit both my thighs (LARGE AND IN CHARGE) and my hips/butt area is a pain in, well, my butt. Because my butt is about a size smaller than my thighs, always.
I’ve taken to wearing a lot of skirts.
#runnerproblems
YES. THIS IS MY PROBLEM.
Is there a solution? (Don’t say stop running, it’s literally the only reason I’m as sane as I am.)
No no no, I would never tell you to stop running (as she checks the bright purple Garmin that is now her wristwatch). No. That’s inconceivable. But I basically only wear leggings.
Me too. Leggings, skirts, dresses, stretchy jeggings.
But I’m fit now and I want to show off my 2 1/2 pack. Or something.
Fair, fair.
it might sound ridiculous, but you can get your jeans tailored! buy the ones that fit your legs most comfortably, then have a tailor bring in the waist/butt area!
Your semi-fancy stores will often do this! Like, Dillards and Cache and Buckle – stuff in the mall, nothing too fancy (though super-fancy stores probably do it too, I wouldn’t know, I’ve never been in one).
I’ve gotten my jeans tailored at Buckle a few times and have always been happy with the price & results!
Uniqlo does it in their French stores, at least. I’m assuming that if something’s actually made to be convenient in France, that it probably is at LEAST as convenient elsewhere.
I have that problem with skinny jeans and my calves! I have to go up two sizes to get them over those beasts, and then they are far too big in the waist.
I too wear a lot of skirts. And a lot of things with elastic waists. That give is just so forgiving for all the standing and sitting I do.
I’m just gonna plug Loft curvy jeans all over these comments, I guess. I have mighty calves (most wide-calf boots are not wide enough for them! but I am otherwise small-to-medium sized), plus a hard to fit waist-to-hip ratio, and not only do Loft’s curvy-cut jeans fit my waist without gaping, the skinny styles fit over my calves as well.
Do a shitload of squats to help your butt catch up?
I have large and in charge thighs as well, and I have really good luck with LOFT skinny curvy jeans! They go on 40-60% sale all the time.
Ugh those boots don’t come in my size!! 🙁
WE MUST PINE AND PERISH
-a 41
Did you check their size chart? It’s actually really weird like saying my 9 inch feet would fit in size 8s.. maybe they run large?
Those optical illusion-type dresses make me feel 50% some kind of fraud and 50% like I have Jessica Rabbit’s shadow drawn on me.
AG STEVIES ARE THE BEST SKINNY JEANS.
And this is the part where I tell the story of how I found a pair of them at Anthropologie that were marked down to 9.99. And they were running an extra 30% off sale sale. And it was a great day.
That is my favorite kind of story.
I only buy ankle jeans with the expectation that they will fit my short, short legs the way normal jeans fit other people, but they do end up looking a bit odd at the bottom. Idk.
Yes, this. All my work pants right now are ankle-length pants that are normal-length for me. (They are not a kind that looks weird at the bottom, but I have owned plenty of those, too.
I do this too! It is strangely satisfying, like getting away with something.
Me too, friend. Me too. *is not quite 4’10″*
Ankle jeans are great because I’m short and then I don’t have to hem them.
Same. If I want to wear ankle-length pants I buy capris.
Has anyone tried that foot peel stuff from a couple of weeks ago? What do you think? How long does it last? Are you able to use your pretty new feet for walking and stuff, or have they become ornamental?
I would also like to know the answer to these questions!
I TRIED IT, but I just did it on Tuesday and the package says it takes 3-5 days to actually start peeling, and according to the user Q&A on the Amazon product page, it really takes more like 5-10 days, so. I will report back in a future open thread or link roundup! I actually bought the TonyMoly one: http://www.amazon.com/TONYMOLY-Shiny-Super-Peelin…
Oh my god I’m so excited. I want to hear EVERYTHING. Please do report back.
I’m really excited for how satisfyingly gross this has the potential to be.
*excited clapping*
I bought that one yesterday and I am VERY excited!
Baby Foot, which I’ve done, tool about a week to start peeling. It did not render me unable to walk. It didn’t even eliminate my calloused, just took off a phenomenal amount of dry skin and made my feet delightfully soft. They stayed super soft for MONTHS, but you gotta keep moisturizing.
MONTHS, you say? Ok, I’m ordering.
So exactly how gross is the peeling? I suffer from dry skin on my feet that is irritating-to-painful, but I also teach aerial dance three times a week. I need to be barefoot in a way that will not disgust my students.
It’s encouraging to hear they didn’t get rid of your calluses. Getting to watch my feet do a gross weird thing that ends in them being really soft is right up my alley, but I both work retail and do a lot of walking, so I kind of need my feet to stay at least somewhat calluses.
Me too! Tonymoly, as of Wednesday, no results yet but eagerly anticipating the peeling stage!
Also, if anyone ever sends me a dick pic, I can reply, “You want to see me take it all off?” and send the person a photo of peeling foot skin!
That is an incredible side perk to the foot peel!
You are an evil genius and I love you.
i did! my feet peeled for about a week, but there were only a few days where socks were *necessary.* And it doesn’t leave behind delicate fragile skin – the bottoms of my feet still have tougher skin in the places they need it, but now there’s no other dead skin on top of it. i have purchased a second peel, though i’m not sure when i’ll use/need it.
My coworker did the Babyfoot foot peel (can’t remember if that was the same brand) and it was VERY gross (aka fun) and VERY effective. She highly recommended it, and I saw the results!
I bought it after reading about it here and I’m just waiting for my friend to return from vacation so we can do it together. I am SO EXCITED.
I did it and I will be writing about it. Stay tuned….
Thank you Jane!
That Courtney dress is GORGEOUS but I would need to find an actual working strapless bra for it, so… 🙁
Also, is this the right place to brag on/link to one of my best friends who is an indie feminist jewelry designer? Because she’s donating 10% of the proceeds from her kick ass FUCK THE PATRIARCHY hoop earrings to Planned Parenthood
Bonus – she has stylized vagina and titty rings on her site http://www.thedriftdesigns.com/shop.html as well and they’re so great!
Those RINGS. !!!!!
Those rings are incredible! I just ordered a vagina ring. Thank you to my mother-in-law for the Etsy giftcard, I’m sure she will be thrilled with my choice.
IS THAT A LITE BRITE FOR GROWN -UPS????
I am VERY EXCITED about these rain boots, but have a question for anyone who might own them already. I’m a size 7.5, and the boots are sized 7-7.5 OR 8. Should I size up?
I have these and wear a 7 and they are large on me, so I think you will be okay with the 7-7.5!
I am also a 7.5, and I bought these boots two years ago in an 8 because The Internet told me that was what I should do, and that was false, now I have to wear two pairs of socks with them because I refuse to get rid of perfectly good boots. So get the smaller size, is what I’m saying.
But the boots with those ankle jeans!!!!
I was trying to figure out where I could buy that eyeliner in Canada bc I’m pretty sure Shoppers still doesn’t carry elf products (although they have NYX now!!!!!) and it turns out it’s on sale at well.ca, so… destiny. https://well.ca/products/elf-studio-cream-eyeline…
ugh shopping in Canada… it’s like internet shopping in 2001 in the real world.
So has anyone tried that boot brand before? I am so curious and wanting to buy them.
I have a pair of Tretorn rain boots (slightly different style) and LOVE them. As in, I own two pairs of Hunter boots and prefer the Tretorns, and often wear them for casual errands even when it isn’t raining.
I love Tretorns. Just ordered these in orange – my fuchsia fuzz-lined ones are wearing out and this is a STEAL.
eyeliner that doesn’t move: maybelline’s color tattoo crayon is fantastic.
i don’t do brushes or other makeup tools, in general, so this stuff is easy and it really, really stays put.
Tretorns are LEGIT. After buying cheap no-brand rain boots every two years forever, I finally invested (and it’s not even that big of an investment) in some Tretorns and they are a world apart! Comfortable and sturdy.
“What is this? Still want.” pretty much sums up my instinctive reaction to abstract-looking electronic nonsense gadgets, I think. I just want to kid myself we really DO live in the future so much…
Okay I want that Maxi dress (the price is reasonable in Canadian AND free shipping) but I’m afraid it will look like pajamas on my body. I bought a pair of “soft pants” a while back and while I love them they sort of look like PJs unless I wear a really dressy top.
Should I go ahead with the Maxi dress anyway? Someone please reassure me.
Dooooo it! I just did! Plus look at the “catwalk” video on the page and it will give you a better idea about how it lays?
I don’t think that will be a problem with a dress. Even dresses that are intended to be PJs are read as fancy. Get it!
The one on ASOS? Just a warning, ASOS doesn’t include Canadian duties on their items (or at least they didn’t when I last bought something from them a few years ago). I found they were usually about 1/4 of the price of the item.
Thanks for the support everyone! I went for it and I’m really excited! Hopefully it fits, I don’t generally buy from websites (but their return policy looks good too).
I see that you already ordered, but I just want to voice my support as well. I’m short and pear-shaped with thick, stocky legs and my attempts to wear soft/ponte pants as work-appropriate have completely failed, no matter how much my leggier friends rave about them. If they’re tight they look 100% like yoga pants/leggings, if they’re loose they just look sloppy.
BUT, I own several maxi dresses and I adore them. They feel exactly like wearing pajamas, but all it takes is a nice necklace and some cute sandals to make them look ~effortlessly glam.~
Jannneeeeeeee, help a pear-shaped woman out! Who makes jeans that have an extra gussett to reduce the chub-rub ruining jeans, but without the weird sew lines that makes it look like a large diaper/maxi pad? Also maybe just brands that cater to big ass/big hips/small waist that don’t have obnoxious pocket design?
Yes, I have googled. I am overwhelmed by the lackluster articles about this shit.
I am very much pear-shaped, and can almost never find jeans that fit my hips and thighs that aren’t giant in the waist…what I am currently wearing that actually fits is Lucky Sofia Skinny (narrow in the leg but not totally tight at the ankle). No gusset, but the fabric seems durable and is holding up to the thigh rub. I’m kinda over skinny jeans so I was thinking of hitting the Lucky store this weekend to see if they have a slightly looser style with similar hip/waist proportions.
Loft/Ann Taylor! It’s been years since I bought jeans anywhere but Loft, because their curvy-cut jeans are the only ones that fit me. I will admit I don’t usually have chub rub problems so I can’t speak to that, but they’ve generally been long-lasting for me, and they are great for fitting my small waist and large butt/hips.
I’m also short with proportionally short legs and they literally the only company I’ve found that makes jeans that are both curvy-cut and petite length. Every few months or so I go searching again, and seriously, nothing.
Maybe check out Wardrobe Oxygen? That lady gives pretty great tips on “help, my body doesn’t fit this item/trend, what do I do?”
1. I have been looking for eyeliner like that (I used to use a MAC one but they apparently don’t make it anymore, and I wasn’t able to find the brush I used to use with it either!) for FUCKING AGES and even tried some pricy ones that didn’t work, so FUCK YES.
2. I refuse to wear ankle length pants. When I was in 8th grade three things happened at the same time: I shot up in height by several inches, my parents went broke, and long pants came into style. The horror of wearing unintentional high-water jeans when everyone’s pants were just barely dragging the ground has never left me. NEVER AGAIN.
2. This. Are you me? I cannot wear pants that do not cover the back of my shoe and do at least a little break in the front.
I have several pairs of leggings that end just below my knee or so.
But anything longer has to be actual full-length pants. I don’t want them to drag on the floor necessarily, but if they don’t touch the tops of my feet and most of my heel I feel really self-conscious in a bad way.
I’m kinda lucky–I’m a couple inches shorter than average, but my legs are long for my height, so I can get away with buying regular-length pants and they’re usually perfect.
They can go bad! It's not as crucial/risky an issue as it is with mascara, but be careful what you put near your eyes!
</grandmotherly public service announcement>
I do this too! It is strangely satisfying, like getting away with something.
I can endorse the AG Stevie’s jeans – can take a beating and hold up pretty well to the chub rub sitch’. Am tall with a butt, but slimmish waist, and they don’t ‘gap’.
YES to that Maybelline Eye Studio gel liner! It's so great and I LOVE that little brush.
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