"A savage, savage, angry song."

One of the loveliest thing things about having an out gay member of ABOFL was that it never felt like a joke when sketches ended with the two of them kissing or falling in love. It was a joke, obviously, it was all jokes, but the idea of two men or two women kissing wasn't the punchline.

"Yes. Your face, my arse."

"My first wife drowned in a mixed salad, you see."

"If you're not loose in the trousers, you might as well not be here."

EMMA'S DRESS. All of it, but chiefly: EMMA'S DRESS.

"DO AS I SAY, CHILD, or by heaven, I'll ask you again."

This one isn't a strictly Fry-and-Laurie entry; it's from the 1982 Cambridge Footlights Revue, but it has Emma Thompson and Stephen Fry trying to out-U one another, and that is a rare gift and a shining jewel.

"My darling, you're looking pale."

"I am pale."

"Oh, my darling, don't say that, don't even think it."

"The reason we're not going to do this sketch is that it contains a great deal of sex and violence."

"A great deal."

"Lots of sex and violence."

"That's right. During the sketch, Stephen hits me several times with a golf club."

"Which, of course, wouldn't matter, except that I hit Hugh very sexily."

"I'm afraid you did sustain a very serious injury to your genitals."

"My genitals?"

"As you can see."

"Oh, dear."

"Oh, as you rightly say, dear. We had no choice but to remove them."

"Oh, no."

"Oh, as you didn't rightly say, yes."

"However will I manage?"

"Hmm. Did you use them often, Mr Kerniff?"

"Well, not really. But it was nice to know that they were there."

"Who thinks it's got any relevance at all?...No one. Okay. Right. So. So we think it's irrelevant, do we?...Ah. Interesting! So we don't think it's relevant...but we don't think it's irrelevant, either? It's in the middle, sort of a gray area. Interesting...Right, so no one agrees with me, but did anyone find that helpful at all?"

"It's just complete balls."

"Balls in what sense?"

"Balls in the sense of balls."

I'm not sure how many of their sketches could be described as "a series of mirrored regressions," but this is probably the best one of the lot.

"Sit. Twenty-four years ago a doctor told your mother and me that it was impossible that we could ever have children."

"Oh. Why not?"

"I can't remember the precise reason. It was something to do with penises, I think. We decided to adopt a child."

I am going away on vacation for three weeks. Goodbye.

"Lavatories: They're here to stay."