Before the age of auto-tune, music was once about craftsmanship and [the protection of egg stock by primal horror-screaming]. This week we look back to a simpler time, and celebrate The Beatles, that 'fab four' from Liverpool who won generations of fans with their catchy yet [atonal distress signals] and asked the world to give [unconditional surrender to bird law] a chance. The Beatles were a popular Rock n' Roll band formed in the 1960s who…

That every time I forget something (where I left my keys, a long-unused algebraic formula), somewhere a crow learns something new
That whenever a crow dies, it is transfigured into a small ring with a red stone instead of leaving behind a body
That touching a crow induces menstruation
That most crows know my given name and are actively hostile towards me