Obviously, we love our original shirt, which will always have the ultimate hipster street credibility of being The First, but we put our heads together and decided to roll out one that a) you can still have before Christmas, b) comes in black, c) is hoodie-optional, and d) buries its misandry in plausible deniability:
(Remember that you always have the option of taking to the sea.)
That could mean ANYTHING, you know?
I’m no merch expert, but Nick says these are slightly higher quality material. I also promise this was not an attempt to give you buyer’s remorse, we just got a ton of plaintive, touching emails begging for a second shirt, and who were we to say no? Thanks for the text suggestion, Linette!
Oh, we’ll be designating this thread as a place for shirt swapping, incidentally. If you get yours, and you want a large instead of a medium, or now you’d rather have a hoodie, come do a shout-out and see if there are Toasties who want to email off-line to sort that out.
Orders must be placed by Dec. 13th!
Tags: merch, meta, nicole and mallory, t-shirts
YES.
is it bad that the money I was paid by the toast is going straight back to teh toast
but I really want the hoodie
Bought! I just hope that customs doesn’t hit me as hard on this as they have everything else I got from the US.
I don’t mind paying the VAT, it’s the £8 flat-fee handling charge that annoys me. Last things I got from the US it doubled what I had to pay.
Ugh. It is the worst. VAT is fine, but then they hold your things hostage so you can shell out so much money.
I really really want the hoodie. so badly. anyone want to buy a toddler for $30?
Iceberg! I’m shocked!
Hold out for $60, and then you can buy two.
Damn, I know it says right there in the post this wasn’t meant to cause buyer’s remorse, but it HAS.
I did! And now I have! Happy Holidays to me.
Hurrah! Now I’m glad that I remained trapped under the cat all that evening and didn’t get round to buying the other one, because I love this even more.
I believe you mean “encatted”
I am encatted AGAIN now, she’s lying on her back on my legs purring so hard she’s given herself hiccups.
encatted is the best state
I AM ALSO BEING ENCATTED
Encatment for all!
“encatsulated”? No.
I think it becomes encatsulated when both of them are on my legs and the circulation is being cut off.
Now I’m trying to decide if it is worth it to buy another t-shirt since I’m already getting the white one. (It is. I know it is.)
HOODIE PURCHASED. Mmm yes good.
ETA: well, hoodie purchased once the site permits me to do so. ::hits “Refresh” key::
Thank you for reminding me that I had not yet bought a misandry tank top. I look forward to flexing threateningly at any men in my vicinity.
nope, no buyer’s remorse. I remain delighted with my work-inappropriate tank top and look forward to wearing it in the weight lifting section of the gym.
That is the best place to wear that t-shirt. That or John Boehner’s staff meetings.
I think we also need a “feel the burn” related tank for this very purpose. I would gleefully add it to my misandrist wardrobe…
No, I don’t want a more appropriate shirt, that’s why I bought the “kill all men” option!
There is literally nothing you can do or say to convince me that you didn’t make A BLACK HOODIE THAT COMES IN REAL PLUS SIZES AND HAS A NAUTICAL QUOTE ON IT especially for me. Like, check all my boxes, why don’t you.
BUY THE HOODIE, PEOPLE. BUY THE HOODIE. IT IS ONLY $30 WHICH IS NOT A LOT FOR A HOODIE.
Buy the hoodie
It is winter and it is cold so buy the hoodie
ooh I need hoodies!
I don’t understand winter and won’t accept it but it still makes me cold nonetheless 🙁
Winter seems to occur every year despite my refusal to believe in it.
Love this. Purchasing as soon as my next paycheck arrives.
I was thinking the other day of having a a shirt with the “eat a little something first.” advice on it. (which you’ll both be happy to know, I follow rigorously.) but reminding me that I can take to the sea at any moment is even better.
I bought the hoodie. YAY.
Oh jeez. Time for Toast shirt #2 to go straight into my drawer.
Can there be a “Kill All Men” hoodie? I can afford one (1) Parcel From America, and I am currently torn between my misandrist and wanting-to-be-warm impulses.
Oh man. I have a little bit of buyer’s remorse since I don’t know if I have the ovaries to wear the first one out in public. But I bought it anyway and now I shall buy this one because I LOVE EVERYONE IN THIS BAR.
Basically in the exact same boat, except I think I am likely buying the hoodie in this one. Basically just trying to decide on a size at this point.
Just noticed the text in the tab on Teespring is “Blackened Toast.”
just let me love you a lil more whydontcha
Would much rather spend $25 on this than on the “everyone pitch in to get our boss a spa gift certificate for Christmas, okay?” e-mail I got at work this morning.
Yaaaay bought my blackened toast.
Is this where I can start lobbying for a tote bag or a coffee mug or something that I can have with me everrrrrrry day? I have a lot of things to tote and I have a lot of beverages to drink, but I only have this one torso to cover.
I would absolutely buy a Toast tote bag and/or coffee mug.
YES there is void in my heart that only a misandrist coffee mug can fill
Holy crap I need a misandrist coffee mug. Or a whole set, each with a different lullaby on it, so I can use them for tea parties.
I really like this idea. Its kind of cracking me up!
Yes! A “Tea and Toast/ Witchy Concoction” Mug!
Behold: pic.twitter.com/Buhnxuqrm6
I would totally buy a mug with the sea quote and the picture of Mallory as a sea queen on the throne of male apologies in an instant.
Ahhh, I LOVE the black and the quote!! But, ahh, but, sorry, I am not as much loving the font/design. Is there any chance that a graphic designer could do a quick pass over this before the design is finalized?? Or maybe the next generation of shirts could be commissioned from the awesome designers and artists that I am sure are populating our ranks? Maybe for a small fee (a la the payment for writing) plus percent commission? I would happily pay like $5 more for an especially amazing and beautiful shirt.
want to reiterate: LOVE you guys. want to wear toast shirts for the rest of my life. also love nice fonts n stuff.
I agree! I love the idea (and, of course, I adore The Toast), but the font (and especially the giant “the-toast.net” on the back) is keeping me from actually buying it. :-/
Coiiiincidence, our friend and artistic genius Haley is actually hacking them a bit as we speak.
So glad to hear it! Was wondering if the typeface could be in a color other than what appears to be grey? Maybe a flourescent spring green/raspberry/tangerine? Would that be cool, I wonder?
Also, will we get to see the updated version?
Edit, again: Would also love to see the ‘willling foe’ line under the logo, as in the first tee…
awesome, I already want one so bad and this is making it even better! Will we get to see the finished design on that link?
also I need more time to scrounge the money together! Will they be available after the deadline?
Email me your deets, Bergie.
<3 u haley
Looking forward to my misandrist mug to go with my tee shirt.
I AM SO HAPPY I COULD CRY. Seriously, this line- I’ve repeated it to myself ever since I first read it. No joke, it’s become my mantra. I <3 u TOASTIES
YOU GUYS WHY AM I SO DUMB?? I can’t see where to click to lay my money down so fast it burns. WHERE? WHERE DO I CLICK TO PAY?? Please take my money, Toasties.
Oh wait never mind, I totally figured it out. I’m pretty sure it was all those capslocky yells that knocked it loose.
Ohhhh those are so excellent! I’m mildly devastated that the hoodie doesn’t have a zipper option though. I promise I would buy at least 3 of them if they zipped! My current zip up hoodie is well on its way to the trash, tragically, but I’m still stubbornly wearing it until I can find a suitable replacement.
PS Is there a canine equivalent to being “encatted”? http://i.imgur.com/pp8MTWK.jpg
bedogged.
FIVE MORE TIL IT GETS MADE, PEOPLE. PURCHASE, PURCHASE, PURCHASE! (purchase purchase.)
(ALSO, 2 HOURS TIL OPM DECREES WHETHER THE MAJORITY OF DC HAS TO GO TO WORK TOMORROW OR NOT.)
This has been “things Cherrispryte is keeping an eye on for you while you sleep,” brought to you by insomnia and optimism!
Four now!
I’m trying to glare my US located wealthier brother into buying this for me. If successful I will try and get him to do his bit for violent misandry and get me the tank. Then I can be dressed appropriately for warrior spinsterhood and early morning toast and tea. _
If any toasties in Berlin/Osnabrück area want some of these delivered, I may be able to help you out. I’m travelling back to Canada for the holidays and ordered mine delivered to my parents… Obviously don’t have _unlimited_ suitcase space, but I’m willing to be a mule for a few toast-pals! You can email me at toast at adina dot ca.
TAKE ALL OF MY MONEY, MALLORY AND NICOLE! Also, I was trying to explain how wonderfully apt and succinct this is as dating advice on Sunday, but my sister just wasn’t getting it. 🙁
I’m trying to buy but the order form keeps wanting a state – it doesn’t seem to recognize the mighty province of B.C.
HELP! I need that XL Bella T for my Christmas stocking!
Whoo Hoo! Thanks for clearing that up, techno goddesses/ gods!
I really like this idea. Its kind of cracking me up!
Maybe someday a shirt will be made that features goth dog thinking ringworm medication is bullshit. Maybe that will happen. Someday.
Is there still a way to get a t-shirt or hoodie?! THIS IS REALLY IMPORTANT.
There will be lots of opportunities to buy merch in the future, but this was a limited pre-holiday sale!
Oh man, I'm so sad I missed this! Good to know there's hope for the future. I hope this one is included in the new merch options! [pretty please!]