1. Why would someone say “Frankenstein. The rumors are true” about a Frankenstein monster? There are no Frankenstein rumors; it was a book. Frankenstein isn’t like vampires; there aren’t old Central European legends about errant Frankensteins living in the woods and hating gargoyles. There aren’t any Frankenstein rumors. There is a Frankenstein novel. The character saying “The rumors are true” does as as he literally pulls a copy of Frankenstein off of a bookshelf.
2. Why is a feud between Frankenstein(s) and gargoyles being presented as one that should be familiar to viewers? I could buy that in Underworld. Vampires and werewolves have sort of generally evolved as being opposed to one another. But to my knowledge, there is no quarrel between Frankenstein(s) and gargoyles. They are not natural enemies.
3. If there is no point during the movie where Aaron Eckhart stops to correct someone, “Actually, Frankenstein is the name of the scientist, technically I am Frankenstein’s monster,” the screenwriters have missed a solid joke opportunity.
4. I have never believed in anything half so strongly as Aaron Eckhart believes in the line “There isn’t. Unless you could animate that corpse.”
5. If the television show Gargoyles taught me nothing else, it is that gargoyles cannot fly while in stone form, much less change back and forth from stone to flesh willy-nilly. What gargoyle continuity is this film operating under?
6. I have no problem with Frankenstein speaking in full sentences; that is an artistic license I am perfectly willing to grant. That is not a question. I just wanted to make my feelings on the matter known.
7. It is clear that the gargoyles (led in some form by Bill Nighy?) are enemies of humanity, but the sleeping army of “tens of thousands” of other Frankensteins would “spell doom for all humanity,” which means they should be on the same side. Why they are they shown fighting?
8. Why can all of the Frankensteins fly
9. You will never convince me that the girl in this movie is not Lena Headey. This is also not a question.
10. Who will go see this movie with me?
Mallory is an Editor of The Toast.