When my family and I light joss sticks, prepare food offerings, and burn paper gifts (mostly replicas of clothes, houses, and cars) for our ancestors in return for blessings such as wealth and good health, it has always seemed to me that what we do approaches worship not so much as it does a highly pragmatic, reciprocal relationship tempered by remembered bonds of love and affection.
I'm a fan of tradition. I don't particularly care what the tradition is, how long it's existed, or what it represents, I just like things you can look forward to every year because I'm an anxious person who craves stability. I'm also a fan of Secular Christmas, because I don't believe in god but I look great in red. Because of those two, let me present one of my favorite Christmas Traditions, the annual viewing…
Stephanie Lai's previous work for The Toast can be found here. In 1926, Aw Boon Haw and Aw Boon Par migrate to Singapore from Yangon. In 1937, annoyed by Kids These Days, they open Tiger Balm Gardens, a site from which they plan to teach Singaporeans about traditional Chinese values. Their company, the Haw Par Corporation, produces Tiger Balm. It’s not traditional values, but it is traditional. In 1988, Tiger Balm Gardens is renamed…
Nineteen years ago I studied every book I could find on childbirth and parenting in my local library when I was pregnant for the third time with my first viable pregnancy. I was a young Native/mixed woman and my partner a young Native man, but I had been adopted and raised by a white family. Knowing I was going to be a mother with so little connection to my culture made me anxious
It's 1998 in Finneytown, Ohio. I'm seven years old and treading water in the YMCA pool. So is my twin sister. The swim instructor, a blond, nondescript woman wearing one of those ugly block color bathing suits is standing at the edge of the pool. A few weeks later, she will save my life when I jump into the deep end, trying to impress my dad with my newly acquired swimming acumen. My
Women scream when their friends get engaged to keep the demon trapped inside her diamond from getting out. Brides traditionally wear veils over their heads during the ceremony in order to keep their faces from flying off. It is considered bad luck for the groom to die before the wedding day. After ceremonially "giving the bride away," the father of the bride customarily selects a replacement daughter from among the wedding guests, raising her as…
