Posts tagged “canada”

  1. This post originally appeared on January 7th, 2014.

    Previously in Canadian anthropological studies: Facts About Thanksgiving.

    1. Guess. It's as good a strategy as any.

    2. They are behaving towards you exactly as they always have, yet you somehow feel strangely guilty.

    3. Something has changed in the wind.

    133 comments
  2. In my line of work, I come across the names of many, many high schools—every high school in Canada, in fact. So I began a tally with myself of the number of schools named after women—at first out of curiosity, and later after developing something of a righteous rage.

    Many schools in Canada and the US are named after their towns, and Canada’s wealth of delicious place names gives these

    30 comments
  3. Analog Toothbrush – Fire at the Salmon Farm

    Cocaine Border Patrol -- Bill C51

    Terminal City Lights -- Jack off the B-Strain

    Gestalt Wave Overdrive -- Immigrant Nation

    Danny Williams Lake -- Meech Accord Butt Plug

    20 comments
  4. Hi ducks! I have been in CANADA for the last few weeks, hence my lighter link roundup schedule, but am now tucked up happily in my large bed with my climate control at 63 degrees, as is my personal preference, about to watch the Tinker Tailor miniseries with Alec Guinness. Now that I have finished ALL the George Smiley novels, I am finally confident in a good outcome. Not for the protagonists, obviously! It was…

    287 comments
  5. The first time I went to Parliament, I was nine, a moon-faced, chubby tourist in a little purple wheelchair. I don’t remember much about that tour, except in flashes: my awe at its baroque grandeur. The theatricality of the whole thing, with the historical characters in costume and rehearsed tours. My dad yelling at security when they wouldn’t let him push my chair up the stairs, for fear it would get the carpets

    34 comments
  6. what Ronald Stan’s life was starting to burn down around him, so when the big century-old barn full of pigs caught fire, he saw a chance to escape. He’d been cheating on his wife — regularly — and in his mind his marriage was about to fall apart. Amid the roar of the flames and squeal of the pigs, the 32-year-old father of two had a thought: Better to just leave. Sure, I have…

    156 comments
  7. If you are unfamiliar with The Littlest Hobo (we shall dispense with any pointless remarks about the American film or brief 1960s TV program that preceded it), it was a Canadian live-action television show from the late-1970s to mid-1980s aimed at children in which the title character, a dog, roamed solo from town to town solving crimes. He cannot talk. That's a real thing that happened on television. I would now like to share some Wikipedia…

    90 comments
  8. Toastrons of Canada! I'm currently ensconced a few miles outside of Portland, and tomorrow I continue my road trip up the western spine of the continent. Won't those of you who live in Vancouver (CANADA NOT US) join me for a meetup on Thursday night?

    68 comments
  9. Erica Ruth Kelly's previous work for The Toast can be found here. Some American Idol drinking games are so socially irresponsible they require that players imbibe whenever they hear the word "dream" on the show. You know, as in “This has been my dream since I was a kid,” usually confessed by a 14 year-old who’s been led to believe that a glorified popularity contest is akin to working their asses off in the…

    21 comments
  10. Previously in this series: Every Irish Novel Ever. This post was brought to you by @askmullan. 1. Will the Cod Return, Or Must We Move to Toronto? 2. Only the Jews Know Montreal 3. The Next Three Chapters Are Set in the 1830s Bush For No Reason But Then We'll Be Back to This 1970s University Women's Studies Department 4. She Briefly Considers Moving to the States For Her Career But Then…

    193 comments
  11. This post originally appeared on March 12, 2014. In an attempt to encourage compliance with the CRTC's strict guidelines for Canadian content (known as CanCon), the government has provided a detailed list of recommended plotlines for Canadian pornographic films. (The Toast's previous coverage of Canadian anthropological matters can be found here and here.)

    *

    A man bumps into a woman on the street. "Sorry!" says the woman. "No, no, it

    62 comments
  12. 100% genuine gossip, sourced by Our Woman in Hastings County. Information provided for entertainment purposes only, keep it to yourself. Previously.

    *

    What popular fast food chain is deliberately withholding ketchup packets from customers placing take-out orders? A certain father and amateur distillery operator estimates he's requested ketchup on eighty separate orders, and received it once. Calling their customer service hotline has proved unhelpful at best.

    *

    39 comments
  13. Kirsten Morry last compared Conrad Black and Barbara Amiel to Disney villains. Out of all the national flags that could be described as “two coloured stripes surrounding a white section with a plant in the middle,” Canada’s is my favourite (although Lebanon’s is lovely too). Though that sounds like a tepid endorsement, I assure you that my patriotism is no less than is appropriately moderate for a Canadian. The protagonist of Margaret Atwood’s book

    56 comments
  14. Most recently in Scare Yourself Silly: Robert the Doll. Have you ever been to Calgary? If you haven’t, you should go. But don’t limit yourself to the usual tourist attractions. By all means, take advantage of the wonderful arts and culture and that permeate the city – but know this, too: Beneath it all lies something else. Something different. Something just a tiny bit… off. There is, for example, a wall in the…

    22 comments
  15. Forrest Barnum last wrote for The Toast about Canadian political novels.

    Figure 1: Yowzah

    When I was growing up, I didn’t watch a lot of commercial TV; we were a PBS/Star Trek household. One hazily remembered day, an enchanting show came on where an excessively polite, strikingly handsome man in a splendid red suit solved crimes with his deaf, lip-reading dog, Diefenbaker, an inside joke I would not get until…

    88 comments