Posts tagged “cats”

  1. Tell me your favorite animal stories, please.

  2. In no particular order, here are sixteen excerpts from back issues of Cat Fancy and Playboy magazines. Can you guess the source of each one?

    She mesmerized me the first time I laid eyes on her.
    She has a sweet, gentle nature and is very interested in what you are doing.
    She is used to playing dress-up.

  3. This piece is brought to you by Maddie, whose hair puts mine to shame. Paul! We are friends, in real life, and I have gotten to see you develop your game Fat Cat In A Top Hat IN REAL TIME, as if we were on an episode of Silicon Valley. Can you tell me a little bit about how you first came up with the idea for it? Mallory! I came up with the…

  4. Previously: Song lyrics improved by cats. The world is a dark and a terrible place. Horrible, morally insane things are happening. Let us resist them as best we are able, and in the meantime replace various nouns in the lyrics of well-known pop songs with the word "cats," that we might whistle against the coming of the night together a while longer: cats keep a-fallin' on my head just like the guy whose cats…

  5. 10 Reasons Robot Servants Are Going to Change the World

    57 Ways Robot Servants Can Make Your Life Easier

    50 Rejoinders to the Reluctant Adopter of Robot Servants

    30 Tasks Your New Robot Servants Can Do Better Than You

    28 Ways Robot Servants Can Assist Your Cat

    26 Small Ways You Can Help Your Robot Servants Adjust to Your Home

    22 Quirks Robot Servants Manifest Around Your Cat

  6. In 1995, an editor by the name of Michael Berliner released Letters of Ayn Rand to mixed reviews. In 2014, a cat blogger from suburban California rediscovered it. Here is what she found. Are Cats Objectivists? A letter to Cat Fancy magazine "I hope...I will have a chance to see the pictures of my cat"…

  7. Yes, it almost inspires a panic attack to think of spending just five days in Morocco when there are so many incredible cats to see! Fortunately, our feline-focused travel experts have mapped out the purrfect itinerary that will scratch and sate that cat-travel itch right behind your fuzzy ears. Day 1: Marrakech Start your journey by hopping off the plane and into the heat of the capitol. Make a quick dash across the…

  8. This piece was brought to you by A Male Reader. The history of cats in Europe and North America is not for the faint of heart or the weak of stomach. Really, no history is. The story of the cat is one of violence, black magic, fire, and cruelty. Few animals have garnered such enduring cultural hatred; perhaps their only peers are snakes, insects, toads, and rodents. Over time, humanity's beliefs about the sentience…

  9. This is my cat. He is useless and degenerate; he is a decadent and an idle trifler who neither values nor appreciates the lifestyle with which I provide him. Yes, my bed is also a bookcase. [preens] Here is the cat I found in the hallway when I opened the door to leave my apartment yesterday afternoon.

  10. One of the nice things about going back to where all your friends live is hearing dating horror stories, is it not? The two following dates were related to me in a hushed tone, and it is my great honour to share them with you. Your own terrible dating stories can find a home in the comments. Let me begin this narrative as it was first told to me: I had eight OKCupid dates last…

  11. Few things in life are certain, but there is one area of human behavior I fancy myself something of an expert -- in fact, I rate my own judgment in this area so highly that I can confidently claim to predict the response of every conscious being with 100% accuracy, should you find yourself in a wagering mood. This is a social experiment that will require a little effort on your part, but I guarantee…

  12. Almost certainly one of the silliest things I have ever done.

  13. Maybe the greatest cat-based listicle of the 21st century.


    This dad who wrote into Dear Prudie is out of his goddamn mind.


    Elon Green sat down with Gay Talese, and they went through literally every line of "Frank Sinatra Has a Cold."


    You can read an excerpt from my contribution to the Hairpin Travel Serial here, and…

  14. Your indoor cat: You are sometimes overcome by the irrational and persistent feeling that everyone else you meet at social gatherings has been given a guidebook on how to behave normally and interact smoothly just before you arrived, and that they are secretly glad you have not been given one. You are, for once in your life, correct. They have been. And they will never tell you, and you will never see the book, but that…